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It’s the nights that still get to me. The kids are asleep and I am sitting on my couch and it’s so still and quiet, even with the television on. And my mind gets to wondering and wandering and a feeling of loneliness just starts to creep in. The what ifs and the how comes and the why nots like to come out to play at night. And it bothers me. And it makes me think. And the thinking is stressful and painful on my heart. Sometimes, I am so scared of having nothing to keep my mind occupied because I know where it can go. And I don’t want to follow. So very afraid to follow. Cause I know where that road leads. I know where it leads and where it can stop and how it can also go on for miles and miles and miles…..So yeah, it’s the nights that still get to me. I wonder when, what if, how come and why not………….

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