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Tonight, my oldest daughter 8, asked to call her father. I was surprised. She said that her daddy had asked her to call him and she never did, so now she wanted to call him. But the thing is, he would have went the whole night and maybe even the whole weekend NOT calling her. And I would have been fine with that.

I don’t mind tooooooooo much that she calls him, I want her to have a relationship with her, but the thing is, he is the type of person that will abuse any situation. He’ll tell her that she needs to call him. And she really doesn’t. That’s his job. She’s 8. She doesn’t need to be burdened with trying to hunt him down for affection. And I don’t want him to try to blame her for not being in contact with her.

I’m not going to lie, it hurt my heart when she asked to call him. And it hurt to hear them having a conversation and laughing together. Let’s face it, I am a big hypocrite. I want them to have a relationship and I don’t. I want her to hate his guts. I want her to shame him and throw all the shit that he has done to us in his face. I don’t want her to adore him, he has done nothing to deserve adoration. But I know that isn’t right, but it still bothers me. I’m just being honest.

Narcissistic people always feel entitled. And I don’t want him to revert back to being a complete and total asshole. He’s been okay the last few days since our last encounter, only because we haven’t been in contact. But when his pride and arrogance has been fueled, he starts acting like an asshole again. He sounded pitiful when they first started talking and then you could tell that he was getting happier throughout the conversation.

It made me want to puke and cry at the same time. I know I need to get over it. They deserve to have a relationship. And I’m pretty sure he’ll mess up their relationship at some point in life. His selfish nature can not and will not allow him to be a decent human being. And you would think that this phone call would prove to him that I am not trying to be difficult with him and that he needs to just relax and be normal, but it won’t.

I know that her calling him will backfire on us in the future. Trust me, it’s not because I want to be negative. I just know this monster. And when she was calling him before, he wouldn’t answer and I had to tell her to stop chasing after her father. Her little heart was always getting broken. I’m just going to go and pray and ask God to help me get over this as well. At the end of the conversation he asked her if she would call him tomorrow and I just rolled my eyes, because I know that that is how it starts. He waits for the kids to call him instead of being an adult and calling them.

I think he really gets mad that he has to be the one that calls the kids most of the time. As if he has to take so much out of his “precious” time and energy to call his children. Or he probably gets in trouble with his gf for being on the phone with his own kids for any amount of time. Cause apparently the night time is her time. No time for anyone else. Or maybe it cuts into their partying time. Lord knows, that going out and having fun has become the most important thing in his life now. God forbid he has to cut in to his getting ready to go out time to call his kids.

This has really irked me, hasn’t it? Yes. Yes it has.