Alrighty then! I survived my first class! YAY!!!!!!! I’m so happy! I had a few “DUH” and “DOH!!!” moments, but my brain cells have been kick started back into learning. LOL! I attempted a cartwheel when I submitted my last assignment, but my body took a vote and decided against it and shut the hell down.
It sucks when you are so “young” at heart and mind and your body looks at you and says, “sit your old, creaky bones ass down!!!” I realize that it is just looking out for me. Keeping me safe. LMBOOOOOOO!
I was happy, nonetheless. I’m happy. I am so glad and so excited that I finally made the decision to go back to school. And my girls see Mommy doing her homework and it makes them want to do their homework. And I show them my grades for the assignments and let them know hey! Mommy has to do good or she’ll get in trouble too! We’re encouraging each other in this process, cause 3rd grade is a BEAST! But thank God my little one is in VPK. I can at least handle that homework. LOL!
Other than school, everything else in my world is cool. The ex is not harassing me because I don’t give him a chance too. As long as I don’t contact him, we’re cool. Lord, I hope that changes this DECADE. Please pray for him to grow the hell up and just treat me with respect. That’s all I want and deserve. We don’t have to be “pals” just cordial.
Still no boyfriend. And still celibate. And both by choice. There are moments when I am feeling a certain way and I feel like I’m going to give in to either one or the other, but I pray and push through the feelings. It’s best to wait and just give my heart and mind time to heal. Best for me and for the future person that God sends into my life. I won’t lie though, sometimes I feel like jumping on the first man that smiles and gives me a compliment! It’s been tough. But God gives me His grace to get through this and anything else in life.
I’ve been reading the book, The Wait, by DeVon Franklin and it is quite good! It is just re-iterating most of the things I know about being celibate and doing things God’s way. And of course, it is teaching me some new things as well. This book is about how he and his wife, Meagan Good, decided to date God’s way, by waiting until after they were married to have sex. And both were celibate before they met. Not virgins, but celibate. It’s good to know that their are “others” out here on the same journey that I am on.
Most times, when you tell people that you are celibate, they look at you like you have lobsters crawling out of your ears…
But I’ve made enough mistakes in my life and I want to do all things right or at least better, this time around. No matter how long it takes. I am just tired of doing the same things and getting the same results…BUPKISS!!! Do I miss sex, hell YES! But will my rewards from Heaven be greater because of my obedience to my Heavenly Father? You damn skippy! Delayed gratification is worth what is promised to me.
Let’s see, I have been celibate since December 2013. And I’ve almost slipped a couple of times, but thankfully, God intervened. And those were the moments where I was mad as hell that He did, but I can look back and say, Hallelujah…He saved me and that’s all that matters.
So while I am celibate, I can focus more on God, more on working on myself, both with healing and fixing anything that is displeasing to the Lord. I am focused on school, my girls and even work! I am getting so blessed at my job this year! And I know that it is because I have been so obedient to God. My bosses are happy with me, and it shows. And I am happy with them and my co-workers. This is where I am supposed to be. And I am getting blessed through my church as well.
I wanted to get my Living Will/Trust done and didn’t have the money and lo and behold, the church decided to do a class and bring in a company that will do wills/trusts for FREE!!! I was flabbergasted! And so excited! God knew/heard what I wanted and came through yet again! So, I will be able to leave my little bits and pieces that I think are beneficial to my girls without any problems. So happy! 🙂
Life is good…