It’s been a little while since I have last written. There’s nothing to report except that God is good and Jesus Christ is King! LOL!!! Honestly, the girls and I are doing so well. They are loving school and life and so am I. I’m just waiting for the year to end and the new to begin!
I’m making a lot of new changes in my life, spiritually and personally. I’m growing stronger in Christ and I’m growing stronger in who I am as a human being. Likes, dislikes, things I am willing to put up with, things that I will never put up with. People are being added and subtracted from my life, like algebra! It’s both good and bad. There are some people that I would love to keep in my life, but they can’t go where God is leading me. And some people I want to keep, but, having them in my life also brings me sadness. So, these are super hard decisions, you know?
Boundaries are being enforced and strengthened, and irrevocable. Those are mainly for the ex. I swear, for someone that is allegedly so happy in his new life without me, he sure is a miserable, old grump. Never seen someone so miserable. Especially because I don’t bother him…EVER! If I had a new baby and a new man, trust and believe, boo-boo, nothing the ex could do, would get under my skin. But the Lord is good and I give my ex up completely to the Lord to deal with.
I was out with the girls the other day, getting their Christmas pictures taken, and I was looking around at all the families and I found myself getting a little sad that we were the only family without a daddy to take pictures with. And it happens, that feeling comes every so often around the holidays. But, I managed to pray past it, and the feeling left. This is just a temporary season, that’s all. I’m in no rush. God has the one for me, and he’ll show up when the time is right.
Until then, I will remain content in my single season.
Work is still delightful, and school is still going strong. I am a little tired of utilizing my brain in all these different capacities, but I got to persevere through. At the end of it all, I will be grateful and happy and the blessings from my obedience will be many.
There is joy in my life. Real, pure and powerful joy. How do I know? Because this morning, the ex tried to get at me, and I was okay. I mean, I rolled my eyes at the emails, but my spirit was at peace, while answering him. And I know he is going to respond with some bs, but I will still be at peace. I prayed for him after I emailed the first time. I said out loud, “I forgive you, Ex.” And I will continue to do this. Hurt people, hurt people. And it’s obvious that my ex is hurt. From what exactly, I have no clue. But, the phrase still rings true. Hurt people, hurt people. So I am trying to love on him as the Lord tells us we should. Is it easy? Heck to the nah. But, every time I pray for him, it gets a little easier. I would hope that he would have calmed down with the anger by now, but he hasn’t. Obviously, he has some things that he has to work within himself before he can be at my level. We really could have a cordial relationship, he just has to stop with the disrespect. That’s all that’s required from him.
Someone told me last night, that he may have moved on in deed, but not emotionally. I was like, WHOA! I thought that having a baby and asking someone else to marry you was moving on emotionally. Needless to say, I got schooled. I pray he receives Christ into his heart. That’s the only thing/person I know that can save him. That can make him whole again, that can calm the seas that are raging on the inside of him. Only Christ can fill that void in his heart, his spirit, his soul. Only Christ can give him the love that he is so desperately desiring. I’ll just continue to pray for him.
Did I tell you guys that I tried out for the worship team? I didn’t, did I?! Well, I did! And I completely messed up the first song, but I do believe that I killed the second audition song. Hopefully, I will hear something back from them soon. The audition was on the 1st, and they said that they will contact people within 1 or 2 weeks, so we’ll see. I leave it to God. If I didn’t make it this time, I will try out again. I’ll just practice harder and now that I really know the process, it’ll be easier for me. I hope…lmboooooo! At least I had them laughing. Maybe they can give me a mic and I can be in the background, just laughing in tune and rhythm…LOL!!!! Ha! I’m stoopid!
I’m outtie 5000, G!!!!! (That means goodbye and have a pleasant day to all… :-))